Unfollowing My Mom

Allison Fleck
2 min readJan 12, 2021

I just can’t anymore.

I unfollowed my mother on Facebook tonight.

It seemed like an extreme step against an older person who lives 1,200 miles away, but I took that step tonight. I don’t want to see angry posts and conspiracy theories.

I might miss some of the pictures she posts of the grandkids. I might miss a birthday greeting (why doesn’t she call me?) I might miss updates on her friends.

When we talk on the phone, we have drawn clear lines around politics, religion, and global warming (but maybe that falls under the umbrella of politics — though it shouldn’t). I put my foot down and stop conversations that might lead to argument territories.

We spent a decade fighting and barely speaking. I have spent 15 years trying to rebuild what was left. It has been especially hard this past year.

Talking about the grandkids is safe. Although youth sports and education sometimes veer horribly close to the forbidden topic of politics.

In the past, I have confined myself to reporting her posts and requesting that Facebook take down the lies she posts. It wasn’t enough. Though Facebook added warnings to several of her posts in the past, they exist. I saw them.

I saw racist rants (I emailed her), and I saw outright lies (but they were right in



Allison Fleck

Data analyst and life analyst. Proud maker of mistakes. A big fan of learning lessons the hard way.